Dear Coaching Educator;
I finally have my sons grades and they are not great! He completed his second year of college and he is not worried about it and acts like I should not be worried. I am very upset. What can I do? I feel like money is going down the drain!!
You are not alone in your concern around your sons grades or your sons lack of concern. You do have many options though for dealing with this situation. However they will require you to set a structure and hold your son accountable to that structure. Setting the structure is not as hard as holding someone accountable to your requirements.
If you are paying for a portion of his education or all of his education you can set or define your expectations. For example: I will continue to help you pay for your education if you earn at least a C or above in every class.
The hard part will be if he does not. You must then follow through with not funding his education. This would be a natural consequence that would result from what you have communicated. By taking a semester off, he may value his education more or he may immediately be upset with you, however he will not change his actions without you changing yours. As long as you tolerate his lack of concern for his actions you are not providing him with “the incentive” to change his behavior.
Sit down and write out your expectations and hold a meeting with him. Have a frank talk with him about your expectations and what will happen if he does not follow through.
I also would encourage you to check out the services provided in the parent virtual room at www.thecoachingeducator.com. Many parents are struggling with the same issues and benefit greatly from having other parents to connect with around educating their children.